


detour thru ur medium

by sapoeysap



Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Gen, meet cute, shyan exchange 2019
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-26
Updated: 2019-07-26
Packaged: 2020-07-20 11:03:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,237
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19991083
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sapoeysap/pseuds/sapoeysap
Summary: detective unsolved is a ratings hit,good for shane's wallet, less good for his sanity. especially with the producers plan for this episode.





	detour thru ur medium

**Author's Note:**

  * For [LightningRidgeBlackOpal](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LightningRidgeBlackOpal/gifts).



> bryce writing a challenge for somehting that isnt power rangers. bryce not being mean to brent. more likely than you think. 
> 
> shane, grumpy host.   
> ryan, cute medium.

Shane is making it very clear to anyone who gets within five feet, that he is not fucking happy about today's shoot.   
And by not fucking happy, he's practically fuming. Pacing the floor and ignoring TJ's forceful 'Shane. Stop'   
'A fucking medium Teej, you want me to act nice, act polite, to a fucking medium. This is all hooky rubbish anyways. I could leave you know. Discovery has been calling and they are better than this History Channel'  
TJ shoots him a look, one that says's 'Shane working for History Channel goes against everything you've ever said about integrity of Television. Yet here you are' (Shane's very used to that particular look.)   
  
'Shane, you love the history channel bullshit, you cynical asshole. It's a medium, for an hour. To get better ratings, to get better money. And you will live with it.'   
  
TJ, the voice of reason always. Shane knows he will have to by his long-suffering producer a beer after this. If he survives this.   
  
Shane hosts this show, 'Detective Unsolved', in which he goes around researching Unsolved cases and completely debunking them. Like re-animates the corpse with lively power-points and snarky banter and then buries said corpse again, deep deep down. It's the History Channels most popular show. Thanks to the power of tumblr and Shane becoming an accidental viral meme when he entered a crypt and said 'Hey there Demons it's me ya boi'. He's kept the status through a dedicated fan base, a skeptic in a channel of believers, and it's not the career he wanted when he decided video journalism was what he wanted to do. But its the video career he's got. And yeah Discovery has been hounding at his heels to steal him away. But he likes the History Channel, likes the team, he couldn't take TJ or Brent with him. And Detective Unsolved would be nothing without his team.   
  
Except his team have betrayed him and hired out his number one pet peeve for an episode. Hired out a medium for this episode. A medium. Definition, someone who communicates with the dead. And Shane has made it clear that his belief, the sane normal belief. Is that when you are dead, you are dead. End off. No communication with the dead, because they are dead.   
  
Brent, his other long-suffering producer, had once gotten Shane for Secret Santa and brought him a 'spirit box'.Shane was only prevented from throwing it at the wall upon receiving when Brent bursts out how much it costs. 'Spirit box that just communicates with radio stations' now sits on his desk, dust-covered and untouched since December.   
  
Shane's killing time (ha) before the medium appears. Going mentally through the words he can say to wound the medium, make it clear that he doesn't believe in this ghost stuff. They're on location, in a supposedly haunted house. Shane's stopped his pacing, sitting down on the chair set up for the shoot. He's fiddling through his phone, laughing at Abba memes when there's a rumbling voice from above him, and a tan hand appears in his vision.   
'Hey there Madej, it's me ya medium'   
  
Shane hates mediums even more. And then he looks up.   
  
Shane Madej is a practical man, a skeptic but willing to argue the toss with the die-hard believers. And he stands by everything he's ever thought about anyone who claims to 'communicate' with the passed.   
  
He'd let this medium communicate with him spiritually though.   
  
'Sorry, you probably get variations on that a lot, it's just I'm a big fan. That being said, you're wrong on just about everything'  
  
'Is this about my Area 51 episode' Shane deadpan replies. He's trying hardest to not visibly check out the medium, but now he's risen out of his chair he can't help but notice how short the medium is. How jacked the mediums arms are, how hot and ...   
  
'I'm Ryan Bergara, a firm believer and professional medium'  
  
'Shane Madej, a firm skeptic and professional debunker'   
  
Ryan's eyes crinkle with a smile.   
  
Brent comes over and starts to explain the plan for the shoot, Shane tunes him out, he knows the plan, he put the graft in organising it with Brent and TJ. Ryan is the outlier here. The one with no clue.   
  
Brent's droning on. _so we're gonna put you guys on the chairs here and Ryan if you could just try and sense the energy_  
Shane's looking at Ryan looking at Brent   
_and I really wish that we had had more time to see how you guys bond but tv turnaround schedules tight you know how it is_  
Ryan's looking at Shane now, giving him funny eyebrows as if to say 'get a load of this guy', Brent notices the eyebrows.  
'Okay, maybe you two will be fine'   
  
They take their seats, its an in house direction, TJ behind the camera ready to go. There are shouts of 'Quiet on the set' followed by 'rolling' and away they go.   
  
Shane introduces Ryan but stumbles over his surname. It comes out as boogara, but it makes Ryan smile and Shane wants to chase that smile. Make more of it happen. But he has a persona to keep up.   
  
'So, I've been coerced by the producers in the investigation of this 'haunted' house, to bring on a medium to see if we can connect with anyone'  
Ryan butts in, 'And maybe bring some ease to the passing of any stuck souls', Shane notes how the man doesn't look convinced with what he's saying. They wrap up the introduction bit. It feels natural with Ryan on his left, the banter is coming easy. It's the actual 'seance' part that Shane is dreading. He's quickfire banter ready. Especially when Ryan starts saying stuff about how he can feel 'certain presences'. Shane's being tested on how far his eyes can roll back in his head. Not from the possession, just from sheer 'what rubbish is this'  
  
Predictably, nothing happens. Ryan calls out, and theirs no response. Shane wants to gloat, but he holds it in, mostly. Ryan looks sorta sad that nothing happened. They wrap up the shoot easily, Shane cracks a few jokes and Ryan banters back. TJ is behind the camera, looking pretty pleased with the footage he's getting, and Brent has this smile Shane can't quite place.   
  
Since nothing happens, and it's just fifteen minutes of footage. They go to dismantle the small set up.   
Brent's asking if they wanna reshoot, but Ryan say's 'no' with that sorta sad smile on his face again.   
  
And for some reason, Shane's not sure of why, he asks, quietly and under his breath to Ryan and Ryan only.  
'You okay?'  
  
Ryan laughs, it sounds hollow.   
'I admire your work. Detective Unsolved is good, and I guess I just wanted to prove you wrong'  
  
'You did though'  
  
Ryan gives a 'huh'  
  
'You proved to me that mediums aren't all insufferable'   
'Oh no we all are, we have meetings and everything over the 'spiritual line'', Ryan air quotes the last words.   
  
'Would you maybe wanna go out for a drink, after all this is tidied up'   
  
'Oh you wanna hear more about my spiritual line connections'

* * *

  
  
'Hello and welcome to another episode of Detective Unsolved, I'm Shane Madej, resident skeptic'   
  
'And I'm Ryan Bergara, resident boogara and communicator to the ghoulies'   
  
'Which are not real'  
  
'And this is the case of the ....'

**Author's Note:**

> title is a paraphrase of 'detour thru ur mind' by the b-52s.  
> i work in tv and this is not accurate to tv work. 
> 
> (also this is shorter than i would like, but i have a tendency to write sad at the moment, and i wanted this to be happy)


End file.
